Tangible Things

We as humans have evolved over time; so, have our habits and how we deal with them. Our minds are as strong as we believe them to be and as weak as we make them. In our constant work to make a life worth living and establish a greater foundation, we often forgot to take care of our minds because that is one of the things that constantly works.

While we constantly think about what, why, and when, we also have to think about how. We often get stressed over things like family, jobs, constant pressure of working, finances, and other related stuff. But how can we resolve these issues, or how can we think that it can be done easily, or that it's just life? Rather than finding the answers or communicating the needs, we often move to tangible things, which can be good or bad, closest to forgetting those issues. Some people start writing, playing sports, painting, or sketching, or some may go for alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, or any other habit which will help in subsiding the constant drums inside the head.

Making space for LIFE – not in general living, eating, or working, but a space for experiences, love, kindness, travel, and much more – is far more important than filling your life with tangible things. I have observed over the period of time that people who haven't experienced intangible things in life, such as affection, listening, attention, communication, and other significant things which make our life easy, often go for things which help in forgetting. But that's making it even worse because if not now, then we as humans often pass our unhealed version of ourselves on to the next generation. Is it worth it?

This realisation today has reminded me of how communication has become just a word in today's day and age. How people think less of communication and the significance of it, yet they prefer therapists to resolve their problems. But how often they forgot the person sitting in front of them is also communicating the parts that are broken. If you have read the classic novel of Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare, you will know how Juliet has taken the sleep potion, believing that Romeo will be informed and come to rescue her. However, the rescue about the plan never reaches Romeo. Instead, he heard the wrong news that Juliet had taken her life, which to Romeo meant he had taken his own life. When Juliet awakens and finds him dead beside her, she has taken her own life. The core learning of this is how communication has caused irreversible consequences.

The significance of communication is getting blurred. The tiniest of issues or the biggest of decisions can be resolved if we as humans communicate in the right way possible. It's not that big a mountain to climb. But we as humans also have to become judgement-free, open to listening, more acceptable, and kind towards the person who wants to speak. The part where communication comes in is that we have to understand that everything is a two-way street. If someone is speaking, you should be open to listening, not criticising, judging, or opining. Oftentimes, people get offensive, defend themselves, reply, or prove their point. But we never listen to understand, empathise, or create a space for someone to feel safe. 

Creating a space which is free of assumptions, interpretation, interruption, or opinions allows people to reflect upon the intangible things and helps in becoming a better person. We are the only people who are responsible for giving meaning to things and deciding if this particular thing or thought is important towards building a life that you want to. We are the ones who are responsible for creating a safe space for ourselves. Not only others, but we have to become accountable for our own actions; that's how a person navigates through tough decisions and hard times.

While doing my research about how to write and what to write about Tangible Things, I get to know that the most difficult thing in the world is understanding yourself. This made me cry and at the same time made me realise how little we think of ourselves and how we have taken life for granted and comparing it with materialistic things. Not climbing Mount Everest, crossing oceans with a swim, cycling to another country, or going to space, but comprehension is the most difficult thing in the world. How tragic it is to live in the world where now understanding oneself is the most difficult thing? How come we have reached here? 

I always believed everything can be resolved when you communicate your needs in the right way possible or in a polite way possible. The hard truth is the sole purpose of being human is to bring change, good or bad; the decision is ours. Everything can be changed in a better way if we speak when needed and where it is needed. Of course, there are situations where silence is the answer, but not every time. We as humans are here to make living easy and as simple as possible, not difficult like climbing Mount Everest.